Murphy's Military Laws

1. If it's stupid, but works, then it wasn't stupid.
2. When in doubt, empty your magazine.
3. Don't look conspicuous, it draws fire in the combat zone.  It draws sergeants anywhere.
4. Never share a foxhole with anyone braver than you are.
5. Never forget that your weapon was made by the lowest bidder.
6. If your attack is going really well, it's an ambush.
7. No plan ever survives contact with the enemy.
8. If you are forward of your position, the artillery will fall short.
9. The enemy diversion you are ignoring is the main attack.
10. The easy way is always mined.
11. If you are short of everything except enemy, you are in combat.
12. Incoming fire always has the right-of-way.
13. When you have secured an area, don't forget to tell the enemy.
14. Friendly fire ain't.
15. If the enemy is in range, so are you.
16. No combat-ready unit has ever passed inspection.
17. Radios will fail as soon as you desperately need fire support.
18. Things that must be together to work, usually can't be shipped together.
19. Anything you do can get you shot -- including nothing.
20. Tracers work both ways.
21. The only thing more accurate than incoming enemy fire is incoming friendly fire.
22. Make it tough for the enemy to get in and you can't get out.
23. Professional soldiers are predictable, but the world is full of amateurs.
24. If your Sergeant can see you, so can the enemy.
25. Interchangeable parts won't.
26. The quartermaster has only two sizes, too large and too small.
27. The only time suppressive fire works is when it is used on abandoned positions.
28. If you can keep your head when all about you are losing theirs, maybe you just don't understand the situation.

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